Recent research from Ofcom suggested that only 58% of adults thought the benefits of being online outweighed the risks. But to have a better time online (and feel more confident) isn’t just about digital skills, it’s about taking charge of what you do, and making time to listen to how you feel about what happens. It’s also about trying new things—from sharing to creating, and knowing that although mistakes may happen, you can bounce back.

So here are a few tips to improve your time online.

1. Don’t always think digital first!

Even though the smartphone is an amazing device, most of what it does can be done better by a specific device created for that purpose (like a camera). Research from Revealing Reality suggested many of us use the smartphone like a ‘Swiss Army Knife’—for everything. Imagine you are trying to support a friend, and want to send them a positive message. How much time will you waste trying to use the phone’s tiny keyboard, when a tablet/laptop would make typing easier, or better, how your friend might appreciate a voice call? Don’t be afraid to break the digital first habit!

2. Take your time

The fear of missing out (FOMO) can often make you feel you have to be involved with everything that trends immediately. Take your time to check out a new trend, platform, or game. Get a sense of how it works, what happens, and who might be involved. There can be a lot of peer pressure to join in, but it’s important you work out if something is right for you, and whether it helps you achieve what you want to when online. For example, you might be more of a social gamer than a competitive gamer, and who you play with is more important than how well you progress.

3. Keep learning, as there is no guide

There aren’t any true ‘digital natives’ (a term adults created to explain why young people may have better digital skills than adults), as everyone has to keep learning about what is happening in the digital world. Developments like algorithms, AI, or influencers means that a lot of the time you’re having to work out what’s happening in real time, and then figure out how that affects what people do online. It’s a lot to sort out. So, before getting involved in posting or creating, or in playing a new game, make space to learn what works well for you. Then, when you’re ready to start, you’ll have some knowledge to help you.

4. Find your voice

Especially when you’re young, it can be hard watching or listening to influencers / successful gamers, because it feels like they have achieved everything and have it all figures out. This may make you feel less confident about yourself—whether about your family background, how you look, or what your values are. But, keeping a strong connection with what is important to you can help you avoid being over-influenced by what appears to be the constant success of others. In time, you will learn how much of a performance it can be for influencers to try and keep their followers, as so much is dictated by them and the current trends. It can be exhausting trying to conform to what you think you should be doing, rather than what feels right and authentic for you. If you hold your values close, you will find it easier to withstand the pressure to follow trends just because everyone else is following them.

5. It’s not your fault

It’s almost impossible to learn and build skills without making some mistakes and encountering doubt and challenges along the way. The secret to success is not letting those hurdles put you off achieving your goal(s). Nowadays, algorithms can make things more complicated as you won’t always be shown the same things as your friends. Just comparing your For You or Explore page with your friends’ will showcase how much algorithms control what we consume. So, think about who could support you if you see something online that upsets you or if you do something ‘wrong’ online. If there’s an adult you trust, that’s great. But, sometimes an older sibling (or even one of their friends) can help you put things in perspective and decide how to manage difficult emotions or situations.

6. Plan your steps

When trying to achieve a goal, it’s great to break down the journey into smaller, simpler steps. For example, you might want to watch some YouTube videos on how people play a game before starting yourself. Or you might do some trial runs of making sure you know how to use your phone to make a video. Practise offline if you can, and share anything you’ve created privately first. Then, if you are ready to be more public or publish something, ask your friends to support that step.

But, in the end, you will build confidence not just by taking steps towards reaching a goal, but by being kind to yourself and allowing yourself to take time out if it gets too much. And if something doesn’t feel right, a different app/game/approach may be the answer; the answer is in your control.

For more tips and support for online wellbeing, check out stem4’s other blog posts on digital wellbeing.